ThisWinterWoman

  • New blog post on ThisWinterWoman.com “Now Faith Is: learning to be comfortable with no knowing”
  • Hundreds of years of pilgrims seeking. I'm in Italy, visiting churches small and large. This one was set at the top of "Castle's Walk" and built in the 17th century. .
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#italy #cinqueterre #monterossoalmare #religion #christianity #feminismandfaith #catholic #catholicchurches #beauty #feminism #women #courage #convent #cappucini
  • I saw this painting for the first time when I was in middle school. It scared me. Not because the image itself was scary, but because it was the first time I had seen a self-portrait of a woman. Up to that point I had only seen women perfected in art, put on a pedestal, idealized. Frida Kahlo had the audacity to paint herself, just as she was- flawed, broken, suffering. She validated her pain by making it worthy of the canvas. .
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#fridakahlo #frida #mexico #selfportrait #painting #beauty #feminism #women #courage
  • May we all live poetic and beautiful lives and forever see the poetry of the everyday ❤️
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#oscarwilde #poetry #beauty #write #writing
  • New Post- "Contemplation and Activism: Love never fails" now on ThisWinterWoman.com
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  • Be still and know 
Be still
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#contemplativeprayer #contemplation #religion #thomasmerton #faith  #church #feminism #truth #god #gospel #comteplativelife #catholic #stteresaofavila #catholicism #feminismandreligion #thiswinterwoman #stjohnofthecross #santamonica #jamesfinley #santamonicacatholic
  • "Only tender-hearted, loving compassion has the authority to name who we are, not our guilt & shame, and not our virtuous attainment. There is no identity than the the identity found in the invincible love that gives itself away" - James Finley
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#contemplativeprayer #contemplation #religion #thomasmerton #faith  #church #feminism #truth #god #gospel #comteplativelife #catholic #stteresaofavila #catholicism #feminismandreligion #thiswinterwoman #stjohnofthecross #santamonica #jamesfinley #santamonicacatholic

I did not vote for Donald Trump. But I am far from innocent.

Dear ones,

I’ve started this post five or six times, each time I am at a loss for words.  My heart and my soul grieve.

How is this happening again? What have we done?

When ‘45’ publicly sympathized with Neo Nazi’s I was stunned. Stunned, but not surprised. I’m not proud of this, but my first reaction was one of superiority- “See?! We told you this guy was terrible! I bet they really feel like shit for voting for him.” I practiced what I would say the next time I saw a Republican family member or friend, the snide comments I would make. I took great pleasure in imagining exactly how I wanted to make them to feel- ashamed, remorseful, embarrassed.

 

It has taken me a few days to calm down. I’m still learning how to love properly. I’m sorry.

 

The thing is, I did not vote for Donald Trump.

But I am far from innocent.

 

I have decades of Thanksgiving dinners, family events, and Saturday morning brunches where I didn’t say something.  An off color comment here. A questionable joke there. I let “respect” or “I don’t want to make it weird” get in the way.

 

I march.

I write.

I volunteer.

How did this happen? I stayed silent when it really mattered.

 

I donate to the ACLU.

I read books by progressive authors.

I majored in Anthropology and Women’s Studies.

What have I done? I opted for a silent, thin lipped, stare.

 

Responding to hate with more hate, or with moral superiority will never fix this. But neither will pretending not to hear ignorant comments, opting instead to “keep the peace”.

 

I am sorry.

 

I am sorry for my silence when my voice may have had the most impact. I am sorry for putting the totality of the blame on “them”, and not seeing how I am complicit in allowing hate, injustice, or simple ignorance, to grow. I am sorry for focusing on how my liberal, and oh-so-progressive opinions make me a more enlightened thinker, and less on actually responding to veiled racism and fear around the dinner table.

 

I will confront.

I will confront, not with shaming, but with love.

 

Always with love,

Alyse

 


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2 thoughts on “I did not vote for Donald Trump. But I am far from innocent.

  1. Silence, there is nothing wrong with silence my whole life I have lived in silence but that doesn’t mean I don’t stand up for what I believe is right nor does it make me feel bad about myself I think that actions speak louder than words therefore I preform action rather than just talk about something. You do all these other things that mean way more than any word could describe and you reach out to people in ways that speak louder than words.

    1. I love this. I absolutely love this. And I think you are so right, actions speak volumes over words. For me, what I have found is that I am silent out of nicety or a desire not to make someone else angry. But I cannot let that fear get in the way of saying what I believe, or to you point, taking action for my beliefs. Thank you for your comment- I so hope you are well.

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